STWG – Prometheus


Alright, so I went and saw Prometheus at the Midnight showing and was super excited about it. It was just fantastic to me.

Then I started to read some reviews for it, and thought to myself, “Did I see the same movie?”
Some of the issues people had with it were just… mind boggling.

The 3 main issues people had with it were: Continuity (within the Alien movies), Applied Sciences and the Story (which is separate from Continuity for reasons I will elaborate on)

It is at this junction which I warn you about Spoilers. There will not be a lot, but you should make note that this review is geared towards the idea that you’ve already seen the movie.

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SPOILERSSSSSSSSSSS
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Ok cool.
So the first issue.

A lot of people point out that in Aliens (first movie) the computer reads the year as 2037, but Prometheus starts out in 2089. To that I respond with, “And technically all the shit in Back to the Future 2 was already supposed to have happened and by now we should have flying cars. Does it even look remotely possible for us to be able to go to Jupiter, much less another galaxy, within the next 15 years? No? Then dont bitch about a date put on a computer in the 80’s versus a computer in a movie made in 2012. I’m sure in 2089 they’ll be bitching that they still haven’t figured out Cryo sleep or how to make their robot dance the Waltz.”

“That’s just one small minute detail though Grokk!” you might be saying, and you’re right, but that pisses me off when people nit pick like that.
-How bout the fact that the “ooze” is first ingested into the scientist, he goes all wonky and looks like he’s going to die the same way the white Alien at the beginning did… then in another scene
-the Geologist Asshole goes berserk zombie on the crew.
-Then Doctor Shaw, who had sex with someone who had the ooze in them was impregnated with a squid…thing.

Honestly, that part WAS a little confusing… it seemed to affect them all differently…
But take a step back and consider the franchise as a whole.
Aliens are a species that reproduce through a type of… Sentient Spore. (Face huggers.)
These spores are contained in eggs laid by a queen, any Alien can become a queen.
Thus we are talking about an A-sexual creature.
The Face huggers contain the Alien itself inside them, plant them in your stomach, and then the face hugger (spore) dies. The Alien grows and then… what? Eats people? How does that further its species? It needs a living human host to survive so that it can plant eggs in it… No one came to the planet for how long in the first Alien movie? So these Aliens were reproducing how exactly?

The crew in the first movie seem to stumble upon an entire colony of Aliens… yet they barely find any crew… and the burst corpse was untouched… so what do the Aliens eat exactly?

The entire species protagonist itself makes no sense when you really think about it… but it doesn’t have to: its Fiction.

I think that’s what we’ve lost in these last few years: we’re focusing too much on the Science and less on the Fiction. And I’m not talking about just the Audience, Im talking about the writers as well. I don’t really NEED to see the 15 minute long dialogue scenes where they dissect something and use that 15 minutes to explain something. I just need to see someone get infected to know right away that infection is “super not good, man.”

So when it comes to the Science and Continuity of it all, simmer down.
Complaining that Hollywood didn’t get the Science of your favorite movie right is like complaining that your 4 year old makes a terrible Shepard’s pie.
Take into consideration the Alien Vs. Predator movies… would you rather have watched another one of those? That’s my theory on why people didn’t like it: Nostalgia. Everything is always better than you remember it, and nothing new is ever quite what you hoped it would be.

You know what I liked about it? The characters. They did exactly what I wanted them to. There were holes, yes. Unclosed storylines between characters.
But that scene where they tell the 2 guys that there is a lifeform to the West of them, and that guy says, “I’m going East.” … GAH! It’s what I have been complaining for YEARS about in thriller/horror movies! Why do people always go TOWARDS the mysterious scary door?
NORMAL PEOPLE GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE. They dont even go into the Haunted House to begin with.

The Scientists were curious and ignorant of the dangers, (I mean, when she said “no weapons” to that guy, I was like, “PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT…..Good joke.”)
The crew were just looking for another paycheck, but didn’t want to see anyone get hurt.
And the robot had Weyland Corps. best interests at heart.

Michael Fassbender blew my mind. He performed the role of a Emotionally Detached Robot amazingly. Every scene he was in, his interactions with the world, with the other people… It was exactly what you would expect from the earliest model of robots.
His dialogue with the Scientist, where he asked him why he wanted to know “why the Engineers made humans”
David: “well why did you make me?”
“We made you because we can.”
“Can you imagine how disappointing that sounds?”

The idea that these “Engineers” made us, and these Scientists wanted to know why even though they couldnt even understand themselves or why they created robots…. I mean, robots are far from actual life but… the idea of Creation seemed to be elusive to them.

So yea, maybe it was the fact that I watched Snow White (terrrrrible movie btw) 3 days prior and this was a welcome change.

But to me, I didn’t let any small details bothered me. I enjoyed the movie as a whole.

/end rant.

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