We’ve covered a lot of different stories here at story time with Grokk. If you’ve read them all, then you know far more than you used to about WoW Lore, and perhaps a little more than you wanted to!

This aside, it’s time to bring you up to speed on what all has happened in the world of Azeroth since the Cataclysm, and what is or will happen in the future!

I. Rangaros is back!

-He’s fully powered now, and has arrived on his time frame, not ours. So… you know, its not “too soon” or anything!

-He brought friends! And wants to burn down Hyjal!

-He’s working with the Old God’s again… just like old times!

II. The Blue Dragonflight needs a new King.

-They’re looking for one… they might have found him

-They’re all in hiding, avoiding Deathwing.

-Hiding is actually a smart idea, considering what happens to the Red Dragons in Twilight Highlands.

III. The Old God in Twilight Highlands

-By now if you haven’t done this quest, you really are missing out!

-This thing looks like the Pit of Sarlac from Return of the Jedi on steroids.

-When you are doing the quests, you go through a nightmare. You supposedly come out of the nightmare, fight the Old God, and kill it.

-The only reason this is odd, is that you kill him with only 2 other NPCs at your side… normally the idea of 3 people taking down an Old God is… impossible. Insane really.

-This coupled with the fact that you supposedly just came out of a nightmare that felt real, and the only explanation given is, “Finally you’re awake.” This also seems mighty convenient given the fact that Inception came out this last summer…

In summary, you killed the Old God, but I don’t but it since Death Wing is still crazy, Cho’gall is still yelling, and the Twilight’s Hammer doesn’t seem bothered by it.

IV. Thrall is married to a Mag’har Orc woman, and is supposedly going to make brown orc babies.

-Nothing further… just…yea… there you go. No Jaina/Thrall anything happening.

V. Garrosh is becoming less of a douche.

-With the events of Stonetalon and Lordaeron, it is becoming all too clear that Garrosh is learning to find a balance between the ways of his father and the ways of Thrall.

-While I was skeptical at first, the major idea and story for Garrosh is this: He is plagued by the past of his father, and so he must be patient and think before speaking. But he is also faced the quickly depleting resources of Orgrimmar, and the threat of encroachment of the Alliance. The idea is: If he doesn’t strike first, and hard. The Alliance will overwhelm them.

-So Garrosh must declare war on the Alliance, or risk the Horde’s annihilation. The trouble comes in the fact that to accomplish this, he will have to seek the aid of those he does not like. The Trolls, the Blood Elves and the Forsaken, all of whom he must earn the respect of.

VI. The Alliance leaders have weird stories.

-Varian hates the Horde, and thinks peace is unattainable.

-Jaina still believes peace is attainable, hasn’t talked with Thrall much though.

-There is an Alliance quest where you escort Varian’s son around doing random Prince things. Come to find out the Prince is actually pretty smart, and wants peace. He disagrees with his father’s outlook. So… there you go.

-Magni Bronzebeard is frozen in carbonite, erm… I mean crystal. He messed with some Ulduar discs. Why oh why couldn’t Brann have been frozen??

I am sick of hearing, “OH NO, I PRESSED THE WRONG BUTTON. NOW WE HAVE LASERS SHOOTING AT US AND THIS THING EXPLODING IM SO SORRY OHMYGODIRONDWARVES.”

VII. Saurfang is burying his son in Nagrand.

-Why its taking him so long to do this, I’m not sure. (His son was as big as a double-door refrigerator though…so…maybe its a tomb instead of just a hole in the ground.)

-Either way, chances are he wont be in Cata very much, if at all. Which is a bummer.

VIII. The two new races storylines suck.

no seriously though, they do.

Goblins

-Goblins suck less than the Worgens though, which is a relief. The Goblins are actually present for most of your questing experiences… all the way up to level 85 even!

-Goblins were helping the Horde before, but now that they are totally Horde we see (and hear lol) them more often.

Worgens.

-From what I’ve seen of the Worgen, they are like the Draenie of Wrath.

-You see a few here and there, but over all they just pop up randomly and act like the token British guy.

-We stole their home kingdom. Which is nice and all, except that after the starting zone, and after the Undead quests… the zone is empty… The least Blizzard could have done is have Forsaken NPCs roaming the streets, with little pockets of Freedom Fighter Worgens running around to give it some semblance of a bustling city after a military takeover.

IX. Minor characters

Sylvanas

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Shocking I know, but she really does only play a minor role in this. A few low level quests, and the Worgen Starting zone and then nothing. Her plotline/major character dilemma is: Forsaken are losing numbers/population.

They can bring back humans as new Forsaken, but this raises the question of what seperates them from the Lich King?

Answer: “Free” will. Problem with answer: If they don’t join the Forsaken, they are killed…. again.

Magatha Grimtotem

Shes responsible for the death of Cairne, and after a low level quest in Thousand Needles, shes now super powerful… or soemthing. Nothing after this though… she just escapes… so….yea. Cliffhanger to a storyline I don’t really know why we’re supposed to care about…

Cairne

is dead and his son took over… Thats it. Big disappointment here that there isn’t more of an explanation or story development.

The Lich King and the Ebon Blade

Basically the idea in Eastern and Western Plaguelands is that with the LK defeated, its become a task of wiping out the remaining Scourge, and turning the land back to the way it was. The forces of Scholomance and the Cult of the Damned however, are working to keep things the way they are.

With Arthas dead, the Ebon Blade serves no purpose, so the members are supposed to just return to life as usual.

Maybe its just me, but I was super pissed when I read this.

We start with some awesome storyline, and given this new Faction and an area specifically just for us Death Knights.

Then Cata comes out, and we supposedly just filter back into society, and disband… even though we still have to come back to Ebon Hold to train.

Why aren’t the Argent Dawn and Ebon Blade helping out in Cata?

I digress.

Over all, some of the stories suck… some of them are looking good so far, and holy shit did they do a good job of making me love to hate Sylvanas